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Yes, it's true...the Buick, the Maroon Marauder, the Biggity hooptee is now officially registered and titled in the state of Tennessee. I still give the old double take when I come up on it in parking lots. I think to myself, "Alan, there's a car that looks just like yours...and it has the same stickers...and, oh wait, it is yours silly," only I don't call myself silly, because that would be, well, silly I suppose. :) So, if you see my car driving around, don't worry, it hasn't been sold and/or stolen and taken to TN. It's still in my possession.

Lord of the Rings

Over the past few days, I've been watching the extended DVD of Lord of the Rings: Return of the King. It is truly an amazing movie. This evening I watched the final scenes that come after the ring has been destroyed and the hobbits have returned to the Shire. I was particularly moved by the scene when Frodo boards the boat to sail away with the elves. Watching the tearful goodbyes of Frodo, Sam, Merry, and Pippin reminded me that I've heard the song "Walk on the Ocean" a number of times over the past few days. Between that final scene, and the lyrics of that great Toad the Wet Sprocket song, I began to feel nostalgic. In that scene from LOTR, we see four friends who have been through an amazing adventure together, and while they may have told other Shirelings about it, there's no way that any of them can understand. There's something special about sharing the experience of that adventure. I'd say that some of their tears come as a result of knowing that one less person will understand them and the adventure that shaped their lives. There have been a number of times in my life when I've felt that way to one degree or another: the final day of Montreat (especially after serving on a planning team), walking through the age out line with The Cavaliers, watching best friends leave for college, seminary graduation.

now we're back at the homestead
where the air makes you choke
and people don't know you
and trust is a joke
we don't even have pictures
just memories to hold
that grow sweeter each season
as we slowly grow old

Come, Thou Fount of Every Blessing

Here's another hymn that warms my soul:

->Come, Thou Fount of every blessing,
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing,
Call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet,
Sung by flaming tongues above;
Praise the mount! I'm fixed upon it,
Mount of God's unchanging love!

->Here I raise my Ebenezer,
Hither by Thy help I'm come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure,
Safely to arrive at home.
Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood.

->O to grace how great a debor
Daily I'm constrained to be!
Let that grace now, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to thee:
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here's my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for They courts above.

Let that grace now, like a fetter, Bind my wandering heart to thee... What a great thought....that God's grace causes us to be bound to God in an unbreakable way...that our freedom as people of the way doesn't mean we're free to do whatever the heck we want, but that we are bound to the righteousness and love of God...that we are free to be the people God intended us to be...freed from sin so that we may be bound to God. I like it.

Green Feather

Here I am as Green Feather. The mask holds all of the powers of Green Lantern's ring, with the added bonus of magic feathers so I can fly...Dumbo style. I made the mask at the superhero party at Montreat on Monday night. Good times.

Zombie Party

This is a picture of me and my new friend Cameron Kuntz. As you can probably tell, she's a zombie. Despite all of my efforts as Green Feather (you know, all of the powers of Green Lantern, with the added bonus of Dumbo-like magic feathers so I can fly), I was unable to prevent her from turning me into a zombie. Good times at Montreat.

Week two

Hey folks. It's Sunday afternoon and we're about to begin our second week of youth conference here at Montreat. the first week went swimmingly. Keynote was powerful. Worship was awesome. As far as I can tell, recreation was great, even though it had to be inside a lot. Our music leader, John Lee, did a fabulous job. I'm a big fan.

I was hoping to include a picture from another blog, but couldn't find it, so I'll just explain it. the blog is www.postsecret.com. It's a place where people put up secrets in the form of postcards. It's pretty wild stuff. Anyway, the one I was going to post says, "Everyone who knew me before 9/11 thinks I'm dead." Can you imagine that? Can you imagine having no contact with all of the people in your life after a certain date? It makes me sad just to think about it. I imagine this person had a life they weren't so excited about, or people in their life who kept them from feeling like a real person. Still, it made me sad when I saw it. One more time when I felt extremely grateful for all of the wonderful people in my life...a family that loved and loves me, friends who allow me to be me, a church community that constantly reminds me that I'm a child of God. Thanks to all of you out there who have been people I would never want to lose or be separated from.

Darth Vader-Columbia Style

I just couldn't resist taking this picture as Dan Stephens was putting on his costume for the opening night skit here at Montreat. The Dark Side is strong with Columbia Theological Seminary graduates. Thankfully, the great Jedi Napoleon Dynamite was present to defeat the dark lord (See below).

Me and Katie in Ft. Collins

This is me and my awesome friend, Katie Jeffries. We're sitting outside Mugs coffee shop in Fort Collins, CO near the end of our half-week of fun...kind of like a nickel bag of funk, but different. Anyway, I had a great time hanging out with her for a few days before heading over to Colorado State for the Montreat West Conference.

I'm currently in Montreat, NC getting ready to implement two weeks of youth conferences. The planning team is hard at work, and our leadership showed up yesterday. Today I'm thankful for an awesome innie team that's rockin' and rollin' with little or no supervision. God is really good...All the time. Called By Name-The Theta Version is on it's way.

Fort Collins Fun

--I'm currently hanging out at Colorado State University, in Ft. Collins, CO. I'm here with the Montreat West Youth Conference folks, getting ready to implement a totally rad conference. the youth show up tomorrrow, and everybody seems pretty psyched. That last sentence was brought to you by a person who has lived with Kevin Day for a year...Anyway, I actually flew into Ft. Collins on Wednesday and spent the last few days hangin' out with my best bud from college, Katie Jeffries. We spent some time up at the Rocky Mountain National Park. It was absolutely amazing. God's creation really is beautiful. We hiked a mile or so up a trail and sat by a waterfall...the sound of the water drowns out all other sounds....amazing.
--I feel like there was something we discussed in small group leader training that i wanted to blog about, but now I can't remember. I really need to write that stuff down. It seems like a fun group of folks. It's great to see people like Marci, Amy Kim, Beth Watson, John Ryan, and various other folks.
--OK, that's all for now. Look for updates as we get into some theological meanderings this week. I'll probably be pretty fired up.
--Oh, speaking of being fired up, last week the U.S. House of Representatives passed an amendment to the constitution to give congress the right to ban flag burning. Can you believe that crap?? I mean, don't we have more important things to worry about? Funny that a political party that's all about "smaller government" is introducing constitutional amendments, trying to intervene in state related right to life issues, and calling for more and more money to support a war that most people think is utterly ridiculous. By "funny," I mean ridiculously sad. Seriously!!! Why does it matter if people burn a flag? Does the water quit running? do buildings crumble to the ground? Do earthquakes threaten to engulf our nation when that happens? I think not!!! OK, that is all for now. As always, any comments would be awesome!

Chillin' in Decatur

• I have now moved most of my possessions to Nashville, TN (the Bellevue area for those in the know). I guess that means that I'm for real moving there. Thanks to the youth and adults from Harpeth who helped me move in: Jamie, Tyler, Natalie, Sarah, David, Carrie, Abbie, Cayla, and Nate. I think that's everyone.
• Right now I'm hangin' out in Decatur with my boy, the Rabboni, Wes Goldsberry. We had a good session of wiffle ball batting practice last night. The air was heavy, so we all sounded like Darth Vader out there, trying to suck in oxygen amidst the water in the air.
• On Wednesday, I fly to Denver, and then take a shuttle to Ft. Collins, CO. I'll spend a few days with my good friend Katie Jeffries, and then report for duty at Colorado State University to help out with the Montreat West conference. it should be a fun ten days. Look for updates from Montreat West.
• On July 5th, I head to Montreat, NC to co-direct the auditorium aspects of the youth conference there. Look for thoughts and meanderings about keynote, worship, and various other aspects of Montreat Youth Conference. Hopefully I'll see some of you folks there.
• Finally, be in prayer for all of my peeps who will be implementing the Mansanetta Middle School Conference up in Virginia. It's exciting for me to think that so many of us will be spending so much time sharing the gospel with so many youth from all over the country. Thank God for places like Montreat and Mansanetta.

Be Thou My Vision

Over the past few days, I've had the words of this great hymn running through my head:

Be thou my vision, O Lord of my heart;
naught be all else to me, save that thou art
thou my best thought by day or by night,
waking or sleeping, thy presence my light.

Be thou my wisdom, and thou my true work
I ever with thee and thou with me, Lord;
thou my redeemer, my love thou hast won,
thou in me dwelling, and I with thee one.

Riches I heed not, nor vain, empty praise,
thou mine inheritance, now and always:
thou and thou only, first in my heart,
Great God of heaven, my treasure thou art.

Great God of heaven, my victory won,
may I reach heaven's joy, O bright heaven's Sun!
Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
still be my vision, O Ruler of all.

Finding Neverland

I watched the movie Finding Neverland this evening. What a great film! I love the way that reality blends into imagination blends into neverland. It's amazing to me that a man who has brought joy and wonder to so many children suffered so much pain in his own. There are a couple of scenes in which James Barry talks about moments in a child's life when reality presses in to such a great degree that the child disappears...the child is replaced with an adult. It makes me sad to think that that can happen to children at such a young age. It makes me so thankful that a world was created for me so that I could simply be Peter Pan and yell "Bang-a-Rang!!!" in a variety of ways. The move makes one wonder about the power of imagination and our ability to change the reality around us simply by imagining the change. Of course, there are limits to this, but it's still a fascinating idea. Is this what we do when we talk about the Kingdom of God? Is this what Jesus was doing as he both embodied and taught about the Kingdom? Does God use our faith to transform the world? Any thoughts?

Stupid Computer

Hey folks. I know it's been quite awhile since my last post. Much of that has to do with the fact that my computer crashed hard as soon as I finished up my school work. Thankfully, it waited until after I wrote all of my papers. Anyway, I've been a busy bee since my last post.

• Graduation: Yes, that's right, the seminary actually let me graduate. I now have a Masters of Divinity. I'll be sure to post some pictures once I can get them loaded onto a computer. My Mom, Dad, and Sister were all here, as well as my Aunt Carolyn, Marvin, Christyl, Nicole and Nadiah. Thanks to my family for showing up. My great friends Tom and Nicole also came. Unfortunately, it cost them a busted car. Some idiot ran into them as they were coming out of a parking space. Anyway, it was a festive day nonetheless.
• Emergent Convention: Last week I was in Nashville for the Emergent Convention. I'll probably blog on some of my thoughts from the week at a later date (I had to actually write them down on paper because my computer was busted...GOSH!!). I was glad to get a glimpse of the community that's been so important for my good friend Mark Shivers
• STAR WARS: Yes, I made it to Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith on opening night. It was so awesome. So much darkness and sadness. I'm sure I'll see it a couple more times.
• Hangin' at Harpeth: After emergent I spent some time in Brentwood with my Harpeth Presbyterian peeps. It was a great weekend full of potlucks, BBQs, and fun times. I'm so psyched about getting up there and beginning my ministry with the youth and families of Harpeth.

Well, that's the basic rundown of my life lately. Look for some more thoughtful posts in the near future.

Loneliness

Sometimes I feel like loneliness creeps up on me...like the shadow of a building in the path of the setting sun. Sometimes I find myself surrounded by people, and yet a sick, sinking feeling finds its way into my heart...a feeling of not being known, a feeling of invisibility. Sometimes I wish we had transporters, so that I didn't have to walk away, or say goodbye before walking away...so I didn't have to say goodbye to people who have actually forgetten I was even standing there...say goodbye in a way that reveals the loneliness I'm feeling...say a goodbye that makes the people around me feel a little ashamed for forgetting that I was there. Yeah, sometimes I wish we had transporters. I hate that loneliness that creeps up on me...like water that overflows its boundaries.

Cars you know

This morning, as I was driving the 1.5 miles home from the seminary, I passed three cars going the other way. Before getting close enough to see who was driving, I already knew who it was, because I know my friends' cars. Katie in the red sporty thing...Davis in the Expedition...Tricia in the Honda. There's something comforting about being in a community where you know what everyone drives. I'm going to miss that next year. I'm going to miss Lindsey in the blue Saturn, Laurie in the silver Honda, Weicher in the green whatever, Jonathan in the maroon buick (but not as maroon as my buick), Shannon in the red SUV, Shelli in the maroon Toyota, Leah in the maroon Saturn with the Grinnell sticker, Shivers in the maroon explorer wow, there's a lot of maroon cars at seminary, Kevin in the silver Honda, and all of the other cars that signify a good friend. Yeah, I'm going to miss that.


The Maroon Marauder...One of the recognizable cars of Columbia Theological Seminary

One Week Left

• Well, actually, it's a little less than a week. All of my work is due on Thursday, May 5th. That's right, Cinco de Mayo. Right now I'm working on a paper of World Christianity. This is one of those papers that kind of pisses me off. We've been given five bullet points, all of which are kind of related, but which have to be answered separately. I'm currently loathing the whole class because of this paper. What's up with making senior write such a tough paper at the end of seminary. I swear we should be able to write one page summaries at the end of each class telling the professor what we learned during the semester. That, or every senior should get to opt out of one paper. I have a feeling most of us would opt out of this World Christianity paper.
• Cinco de Mayo is a holiday time, a holiday time in Mexico. Cinco de Mayo is a holiday time...to the fiesta we'll go, go, go. LA LA LA LA LA! Those are the words to a song I remember singing in elementary school. Maybe my sister Anna can fill in the lyrics for the verse. I can't ever remember them.
• I went to church at Oakhurst Presbyterian Church today. I really should have been going there throughout seminary. I enjoy the atmosphere. Nibs doesn't mind addressing some issues. I was particularly fond of the way they introduced their plans for Pentecost Sunday. They're encouraging everyone to invite someone. In the announcements, Nibs said something like, "Invite your friends, your family, your neighbors, your enemies...they won't be enemies after we worship God together." How awesome is that? Invite your enemies to church. What a novel concept. I just love that.
• Nibs also called for us to be people of the dove. Indeed, what a different world we might live in if everyone covenanted to live as people of the dove...the dove of peace...the dove of the spirit...the dove of understanding.
• Something I'm thankful for: Good friends. People I can shoot the bull with and have fun with. For example, Clay Thomas just walked in and chatted it up for a minute. Good friends. For example, Lindsey Wade and Mark Shivers went to Martinis and Imax with me on Friday night. Good friends. Yeah, I'm thankful for that.

Pre Prom Party

Here I am before seminary prom. I'm drinking Shiner Bock from the keg that Davis and I purchased. That's right, folks, Pre Prom Party...P3 (that's P cubed).
Before Prom

To Harpeth and back

• I drove up to Brentwood, TN this weekend to talk more specifically about my call to Harpeth Presbyterian Church. It was a great weekend. I had fun hanging out with folks from the church on Saturday and Sunday. Sunday morning, some of the younger youth of the church did a musical about Shadrach, Meshach, and Obednigo. Something like, "The Cool Furnace." It was great. Highly enjoyable.
• On the way up to TN, I was struck by how many of those darned ribbon magnets I saw on people's cars. Some cars had three magnets telling me to, "Support Our Troops." I mean, do you really need three, one yellow, one stars and stripes, and one camoflauge. I finally saw one that was more of an indicative statement rather than an imperative. It actually said, "I Support Our Troops." At least that person wasn't telling me what to do. I have to say that I think the magnets are getting ridiculous. I was chatting with my roommate Davis about this the other day. He raised the question, "Are you really supporting the troops in a helpful way by buying a maget, slapping it on your car, and letting it fade in the sunshine?" He had heard a soldier say that he didn't see it as that supportive. We began to talk about whether it might be more supportive to write letters to a lonely soldier, or send care packages to one's local batallion. Some of us feel like we're supporting our troops by calling for their early return from harm's way. I'd be interested in any thoughts about magnets and their relationship to supporting our troops.
• Speaking of comments...While I love it that people are actually reading this thing and making comments, I would love it even more if you would sign your name at the end of comments. No need to join blogger, although that would be fun too. Just sign a name at the end of the comment would help me gain a bit of insight into the wonderful people who are reading.
• This past week at school I felt like every day was full of blog material. I think I've already commented on how disappointed I was with the seminary community for failing to show up for Colloquium, mostly because people didn't like the topic, or assumed that the speakers would be too, "Evangelical," or, "Conservative." Awesome...just ignore those who think differently that you do. Anyway, that bummed me out.
• We were reading Karl Barth in Christology class last week. Sometimes I really love Barth, and then sometimes I just want to strangle him and say, "Get someone to edit your stuff!!!" I love it that he calls us to believe that Jesus Christ is really God With Us...as in, God was really in Christ, reconciling the world to God's self...that God suffered...that God shows God's hand by being truly present in Jesus Christ. My colleague Shelli Latham is write that we don't hear that enough, but does Barth have to say it on every page. Maybe we could space it out amongst other theologians so he doesn't have to say it all the time.
• OK, so much rambling. Three more weeks until graduation. That's crazy. Prayers for me and my seminary colleagues would be greatly appreciated.

Wishing I had the energy to blog

Hey there, folks. It's closing in on midnight on a random Thursday night, and yet again, I'm feeling too exhausted to contribute anything of any substance to my blog. I feel like I have so many things I've wanted to share lately, but haven't made time to do so. I'm hoping that tomorrow I can get some thoughts down. For now, know that all is well in Decatur. We had seminary prom last Saturday...what a blast. Our house hosted the Pre Prom Party (P cubed for short). Good times. This weekend I'm headed up to Brentwood, TN to, "negotiate terms of call," with Harpeth. Hell if I know what to negotiate. I have some basic ideas, but have no idea about specifics. Any advice would be helpful. OK, off to sleep land with the hope of free time for productive blogging tomorrow.

Spring Break 2005

Last week I was at the beach in Pawleys Island, SC. Big thanks to the Chappells from Columbia, SC for letting a bunch of seminarians crash at their lovely beach house. It was a great week of relaxation and rejuvenation for us all. The core group was Lindsey Wade, Laurie Taylor, John Weicher, and I, with guest appearances from Mark Shivers, Brad Clayton, and Shannon Edgerton. Good times with good friends.
So, I know that some of you are wondering if I've made a decision about where I'll be next year (and a few years after that). Well, I have accepted a call to serve as the Association for Youth and Families at Harpeth Presbyterian Church in Brentwood, TN. It's a 250 member church just south of Nashville. The people there are awesome, and I'm excited about the ministry that the church is doing. There was something about the place that just felt right. Whether you want to call that, "the gut," or the Holy Spirit, I don't know, but something kept saying, "Alan, Harpeth is the place for you." I don't know where I'll be living yet, or really much else than that I'm going there. Thanks to everyone for their words of support and encouragement as I've gone through the call process.
Finally, tomorrow, April 12th, is my birthday. On that date, in 1977, Alan Bancroft entered the world. I'm looking forward to celebrating with folks at Sweetwater on Thursday afternoon.